If we’ve met at a conference, you might find this surprising: I’m a complete introvert.
Yes, really. Networking, small talk, and being surrounded by strangers don’t come naturally to me. But over the years, I’ve learned how to navigate conferences, turning them from overwhelming events into opportunities I now enjoy.
Being an introvert shouldn’t hold you back from reaching any goal you have—whether it’s building connections, sharing your expertise, or learning from others. It’s not a flaw; in fact, it can be a real strength once you understand how to use it.
In this article, I’ll share my personal experiences and the strategies that have helped me make conferences not only manageable but enjoyable. Whether you’re a fellow introvert or simply someone looking for a fresh perspective, I hope my tips inspire you to embrace your unique approach to these events.
What does it mean to be an introvert?
I don’t know why, but being an introvert is sometimes seen in a negative light. It’s as if it means you’ll struggle to make friends or won’t achieve success. Let me tell you, that’s complete nonsense.
Being an introvert doesn’t mean we’re bad at socializing or unable to do well in professional settings. It simply means we recharge differently. Extroverts gain energy from social interactions—they thrive in groups, the more, the better. Introverts, on the other hand, get their energy from being alone. After a week of social activities, even if it’s just meeting friends, I feel exhausted and need a break to recover.
What helped me understand myself better was reading the book Quiet by Susan Cain. If you’ve ever felt out of place as an introvert, I can’t recommend it enough. It opened my eyes to the fact that being introverted isn’t a weakness—it’s just a different way of experiencing the world.
Here’s how I see it: Introverts often prefer deeper, one-on-one conversations over group discussions. We might be more reflective, choosing our words carefully before we speak. Sometimes, we even notice details others miss because we’re often observing instead of talking.
Being an introvert doesn’t mean we can’t attend conferences, network, or have meaningful conversations. It just means we approach these situations in a way that works best for us. With a little planning and the right mindset, introverts can fully participate and even enjoy these experiences.
Challenges for introverts at conferences
Let’s be honest—conferences can be tough when you’re an introvert. Walking into a room full of strangers, trying to make small talk, or just being around so many people all day can feel overwhelming. And most of the time, these events last two days, which means doing it all again tomorrow.
Here are some of the challenges I face:
1. Feeling drained
Two days of people, after parties, talking, and listening to talks—plus barely any time to process it all. Sometimes, my head feels like it’s exploding with information and conversations. By the end, I’m just longing to get back home to think everything through.
2. Big crowds
At big venues with so many people, I sometimes feel completely lost. I find myself looking around, hoping to spot just one familiar face—someone I can say hi to without putting all my energy into starting a small talk conversation with a stranger.
3. Not feeling like small talk
There are days I show up to an event with all my best intentions, but I just don’t feel like talking to anyone new. Maybe I didn’t sleep well, or something’s going on in my life, and it’s just not happening. But after the event, I always kick myself: why didn’t I try harder to talk to more people?
4. No time to recharge
Some people go back to their hotel room early, skip the after parties, and recharge. I’m not one of them. FOMO (fear of missing out) always kicks in. I’ll go to every after-party I can—at least until 11 o’clock—because after that, I’m just done.
For me, there’s almost no time to recharge until I finally get back home.
5. Feeling alone in a crowd of people
I know we introverts are famous for being great at being alone. And I love a whole weekend just for myself, not talking to anyone. But being alone in the middle of a crowd of people? That’s a completely different story.
Sometimes it feels like everyone already knows each other. Are they all coworkers who came together? Is there anyone here who would actually want to talk to me? For a moment or two, I can feel really lonely.
6. Being in an unknown environment
At most conferences, you’re not in your usual environment. You’re not going home to sleep in your own bed. Instead, you’re in a hotel room, staying out late, and everything feels just a bit off. I’ve noticed this makes a huge difference for my energy levels.
When I attend a conference here in Zürich, where I live, it’s so much easier. I can go home at the end of the day, sleep in my own bed, wake up feeling more like myself, and enjoy my usual routine—my own kitchen, my morning coffee, and the way I always start my day. By the end of it, I feel so much more balanced.
Tips for introverts to enjoy conferences
After reading my challenges, it might sound like I don’t enjoy conferences at all. But that’s not true—I love them! I’m already excited about my next one.
So, how do I make conferences not just about the challenges but also enjoyable and a great experience? Here are the strategies that work best for me:
1. Start with smaller events
It’s scary to go to a big conference where you don’t know anyone and have to talk to strangers. And let me tell you, it’s even worse if it’s a huge conference with way too many people.
My pro tip is to start small. I began with meetups in Zürich, and believe me, that was already enough to give me a nervous breakdown at first. I still remember my first meetup, the WordPress meetup. By the end of the day, I had met just one person—a girl whose now a dear friend of mine. But before leaving, I told my boyfriend, “Why am I doing this to myself?”
With time, meetups stopped being scary, and the natural next step was bigger conferences.
2. Join workshops or pre-events
Many conferences offer workshops or smaller gatherings the day before the main event. These are perfect for introverts. You’re in a smaller group, focused on learning something together, which makes conversations so much easier. Plus, you’ll already know people when the big conference day arrives.
At my first conference in Barcelona, I attended an international search course the day before the summit. I met people during the workshop, and the next day, I already had familiar faces to talk to.
Or take BrightonSEO, for example—they always have Fringe Events. These are independently organized evening events where you can meet people in a smaller setting.
So my recommendation? Arrive a day early and take advantage of these smaller events.
3. Plan breaks for yourself
We introverts need time to recharge, especially after a full day of talking, listening to presentations, and meeting people. One thing I’ve learned the hard way is not to overplan my schedule after a conference.
As I’ve mentioned, I’m not good at taking the evening off when I’m at a conference. I want to enjoy the full experience. But that also means I come back home completely drained. So, I’m careful not to plan anything for the days after, and most of the time, I keep the entire week free from commitments.
In the past, I’d end up cancelling plans with friends or skipping social events because I just didn’t have the energy. Now, I schedule downtime after conferences, so I can recover without feeling guilty.
4. Be prepared
If you get nervous about talking to people or presenting, preparation is your best friend. For example, when I’m speaking on stage, I practice for weeks in advance. I go through my 20-minute talk every other day to feel confident.
The same goes for networking. If you’re worried about starting conversations, think of a few icebreakers or questions to ask people. And prepare your answers—you already know people will ask what you do, so get your pitch ready.
Typical small talk questions are:
- Where are you from?
- What do you do?
- Have you seen this presentation? What did you think?
Being prepared makes everything feel less stressful.
5. Take a hotel or an apartment
When I first started going to conferences, the agency I worked at didn’t support me. But I’m not someone who’s easily stopped. So, I took vacation time and paid for it myself, which meant staying in hostels because some cities are expensive.
It was horrible. Sharing a room with others is really not what you want to do at my age—I am already in my 30s. I felt completely out of place and like I never had a moment to myself.
This changed when I started speaking. I knew I needed to perform on stage, so I started staying in hotels instead.
Having a hotel room helps because you know you can close the door and be alone. And honestly, taking a nice shower in a private bathroom is so much better than dealing with a shared one in a hostel.
Conclusion
I really hope this article helps you overcome your fear of going to a conference as an introvert. Conferences can be such a great way to meet people—amazing people from your industry—and to learn new things and broaden your perspective.
So please, don’t let yourself be held back by the strange prejudice that introverts can’t do social things or should stay invisible. We are not invisible. And if you still don’t believe me, let me emphasize it again: read Susan Cain’s book Quiet.
